How do we make once enough? This might be one of those questions that leads to better questions. Or maybe the answer after a lifetime of inquiry remains “I don’t know.” Pre-lifetime-of-inquiry, I definitely don’t know. I suspect though it involves a lot of no: of both saying no and having no said to you.<\/p>\n
\u2018It is only half an hour\u2019–\u2018It is only an afternoon\u2019–\u2018It is only an evening,\u2019 people say to me over and over again; but they don\u2019t know that it is impossible to command one\u2019s self sometimes to any stipulated and set disposal of five minutes–or that the mere consciousness of an engagement will sometime worry a whole day\u2026 Who ever is devoted to an art must be content to deliver himself wholly up to it, and to find his recompense in it. I am grieved if you suspect me of not wanting to see you, but I can\u2019t help it; I must go in my way whether or no.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
He wasn’t alone. White declined an invitation to join a\u00a0committee of the Arts and Sciences for Eisenhower with a thank you and a joke: “I must decline, for secret reasons.”<\/p>\n
I say no a lot. I say no to invitations, to offers, to work that takes up time but doesn’t get me closer to my dreams; in short, I say no to anything I wouldn’t want to be mid-doing if it became the last thing I did. If my answer to a dinner invitation, project collaboration, or client request is not an unqualified, enthusiastic, have-to-do-it yes, I\u00a0say no.<\/p>\n
This position is a privileged one: I’m an immigrant with parents who came to the US and had to start from scratch; they couldn’t say no, so that I, in time, could. They showed me that fortunes can be made, lost, made again, and lost again, but that time is always more valuable. In the hierarchy of precious objects, it’s to me the most precious. Lost time is lost. It can’t be made up or made again.<\/p>\n
Saying no, and saying it often might be one of the most important things you can do for your dreams. We all have far less time than we think, and we need more of it than we know. This adage is especially true for anyone committed to creating, building, solving, or living.<\/p>\n<\/span>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"If it’s true your life flashes before your eyes just before you die, what follows in that first moment after death? Statistically, it’s possible nothing follows. Your consciousness ends. It’s all over for the sentient being that is you. Statistically, it’s also possible something follows, and the sentient being that is you somehow continues to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1689,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[19,3,1,53],"tags":[20,42,21],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/clarindawrites.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/IMG_8648.png?fit=1280%2C1280&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p7ngIK-qb","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":12,"url":"https:\/\/clarindawrites.com\/index.php\/2016\/03\/23\/the-folly-that-follows\/","url_meta":{"origin":1623,"position":0},"title":"The folly that follows","date":"March 23, 2016","format":"image","excerpt":"Some writers excel at setting aside time to write and then filling that time with everything else but writing. 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He didn't know what\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "On How To Live"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/clarindawrites.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/IMG_6135.jpg?fit=1200%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1332,"url":"https:\/\/clarindawrites.com\/index.php\/2016\/07\/15\/weekend-rx-the-reinvention-of-normal\/","url_meta":{"origin":1623,"position":3},"title":"Weekend Rx: The reinvention of normal","date":"July 15, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"The Reinvention of Normal (7 mins 43 secs) This charming film follows artist, designer, and inventor Dominic Wilcox as he experiments with new ideas. It's endearing and inspiring. I highly recommend it. https:\/\/vimeo.com\/122959827","rel":"","context":"In "Making Art"","img":{"alt_text":"Top view of dry green tea leaves laid flat","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/clarindawrites.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/IMG_7017.jpg?fit=1200%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":940,"url":"https:\/\/clarindawrites.com\/index.php\/2016\/06\/06\/maps-you-are-whole\/","url_meta":{"origin":1623,"position":4},"title":"MAPs: You Are Whole","date":"June 6, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Your Monday art post: You Are Whole (15 mins 59 secs) https:\/\/vimeo.com\/118488026","rel":"","context":"In "MAPs"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/clarindawrites.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/06\/IMG_6557.jpg?fit=1200%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":700,"url":"https:\/\/clarindawrites.com\/index.php\/2016\/05\/10\/tuesday-art-post-danny-annie\/","url_meta":{"origin":1623,"position":5},"title":"Tuesday art post: Danny & Annie","date":"May 10, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Here\u2019s your Tuesday art post: watch uninterrupted. 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